top of page

Why Women Should Have Sex More than Men

There’s an actual scientific reason, and it starts with the brain.


It’s a common misconception that men should have sex more than women.


This is linked to the thought that men supposedly have a higher libido than women, but research shows this isn’t actually the case. Women want sexjust as much as men, but their sexual desire may decrease if the sex doesn’t vary. Keep the sex interesting, and you’ll keep her interested.


In actuality, there’s a scientific reason why WOMEN should have sex more than men.


Let me explain:


An interesting difference between the brains of men and the brains of women that you may not know is that men have 50% more serotonin receptors than women do.


This means that men have, in general, higher levels of serotonin than women.

Serotonin “is a chemical in your brain that, among other things, scientists believe regulates mood.” Low serotonin levels are associated with recurrent depression and anxiety. Hence why many antidepressants are SSRIs, which stands for “Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors.” These types of antidepressants increase the levels of serotonin in the brain and block its reabsorption.



Higher levels of serotonin are linked to lower levels of anxiety and depression.


So why should women have more sex than men?


When we have sex, before, during, and after we orgasm, our brains release dopamine and serotonin.


Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that contributes to how we feel pleasure and motivates us to seek out pleasure-giving activities. Thus, it’s thought to play a a major role in the reward circuits in our brain. Like serotonin, not having enough dopamine can be linked to depression.


According to PET scans taken at the moment of orgasm, the reward circuits in our brains light up like crazy. While you don’t have to have an orgasm to benefit from the release of dopamine and serotonin during sex (as long as you’re experiencing pleasure, you’re getting them), the largest release of the chemicals occurs during an orgasm. You can see this “show” by watching the video below of an actual woman’s brain during an orgasm.


As you are having sex (as long as you are deriving pleasure from it), your body releases two feel-good chemicals (serotonin and dopamine) linked to improving and regulating your mood as well as lighting up the pleasure and reward centers of your brain.

Higher levels of those two chemicals decrease your chance of having anxiety and depression.

Since women have LESS serotonin receptors than men, they should have sex MORE than men.

Having sex is a very powerful way that women can mitigate the effects of naturally lower levels of serotonin.

How often should women have sex?

Whether you’re a woman or partnered with a woman, the jury’s out on the “perfect” number of times a woman should have sex in a given week, but if men have 50% more receptors than us, shouldn’t we need TWICE as much sex?

Research has shown that “couples who have sex at least once a week are happier than those who have sex less frequently” (I’d be curious to find research about how happy those individuals were in the number of times they and their partner had sex).

But, since sex is a major way a woman can counteract low serotonin levels, I would say it’s up to the woman and what she believes she’s needing.

Clearly, if a woman’s having too much sex that can cause other problems, so it’s all about finding the right balance for the woman/couple.

There are five other scientifically proven ways one can increase serotonin:

  1. Medication (like SSRIs)

  2. Diet (Tryptophan, the amino acid found in turkey and other foods, may increase it)

  3. Light (Exposure to the sun may increase it).

  4. Exercise (especially aerobic)

  5. Massage

If a woman is wanting to increase her serotonin levels naturally, then she should skip #1 on the list and focus on the rest. She should monitor her diet and make sure she gets out in the sun regularly. As we’ve already mentioned sex, a woman could also combine sex with #4 and #5. An erotic massage could turn into a very physical time in bed.

While men have always been considered lusty animals that can’t control their urges, it would make more sense that that’d be true for women. The way our brains are set up means that we need to work harder to get that serotonin to stave off depression and anxiety.

So, when you’re feeling down and/or anxious, know that sex, especially in the context of a loving and supportive relationship, can give you the bump you need to feel better.


Want to have more sex? Sign up here to get a FREE copy of my “How to Have More Sex” checklist.

126 views1 comment
bottom of page